What does it mean to be brave? Is it about having bullet-proof confidence, or smug certainty?
If so, I’ve been doing it wrong all my life.
Reflecting on the times when I’ve been brave, I can’t recall a single episode where I’ve felt bullet-proof or certain.
The time I moved countries to attend grad school? I was terrified. For months, I had major imposter syndrome.
The time I left my marriage? (…because, to paraphrase Cheryl Strayed, I realised I didn’t love him hard enough or true enough or big enough or right). Was it the brave and right thing to do? Absolutely. Was I scared and uncertain? You bet.
The time I left a well-paid, but soul-destroying career to start my own business? I was totally wracked with self-doubt. And yes, it turned out to be the bravest, best career choice ever. But still, I felt more weenie than winner at the time.
I’ve learned one thing about bravery:
Being brave doesn’t mean you’re not terrified.
It’s being terrified and proceeding anyway, in spite of the fear and uncertainty. And if you splatter, it’s about getting up again.
Today I’m in conversation with Suzy Walker, the editor of Psychologies magazine. Suzy is also a life coach, the author of two books, Making the Big Leap and The Big Peace, and is momma to Charlie (human) and Oscar (canine).
Suzy and I discuss what it means to be brave; why resilience is key (especially if you’ve splattered); and why you don’t have to be the smartest or the most talented to be successful.
- Suzy dreamt of crashing her car – a sign that she needed to be brave and make a change
- Bravery vs. talent
- Handling your inner critic
- Tips on making a big leap
- Suzy puts her coaching hat on and answers some of your listener questions (on becoming self-employed; on struggling with self-promotion; and on busting a rut)
Please enjoy my conversation with Suzy Walker.
Quotes by Suzy:
“Courage is moving forward when you’re scared to death… and knowing when not to move forward.”
“By being brave, you open all of the doors.”
“You’ll never be confident enough to do it. You have to do it so you’ll become confident.”